June 28, 2008

The Tag Season

Posted in Uncategorized at 2:52 am by RJ

Reems tagged me and she felt Sakhi would beat me! 😛

1.       Last movie you saw in a theater?

Get Smart – I am going to watch it in another 2 hrs

2.       What book are you reading

The Kite Runner – Khaled Hosseini. I bought this book after reading Amit’s review on A Thousand Splendid Suns – Khaled Hosseini. I think this author is pretty cool.

3.       Favorite board game?

Snake & Ladders – It’s quick! I haven’t played this in a long time. Chess too!

4.       Favorite magazine?

None – not a magazine person

5.       Favorite smells?

Perry Ellis 360, Smell of gasoline, paint, coffee, old currency note

6.       Favorite sounds?

Anything that A. R. Rahman plays

7.       Worst feeling in the world?

When somebody is not expressive!

8.       What is the first thing you think of when you wake up?

Is it Friday yet?

9.       Favorite fast food place?

Any place that serves food fast

10.   Future child’s name?

I have stopped planning about the future. We’ll see when it happens

11.   Finish this statement. “If I had lot of money I’d….?

Be very happy 😛

12.   Do you sleep with a stuffed animal?

No – who comes with such questions??

13.   Storms – cool or scary?

Scary!

14.   Favorite drink?

Chocolate milkshake/Mango lassi

15.   Finish this statement, “If I had the time I would….”?

Probably learn many new sports, languages and do some creative stuff

16.   Do you eat the stems on broccoli?

If it’s seasoned, I would

17.   If you could dye your hair any color, what would be your choice?

Black, when I get grey hair (all this is possible if I don’t go bald)

18.   Name all the different cities/towns you’ve lived in?

Srivilliputtur, Chennai, Thane, Mulund, Pune (2 weeks), Stamford, LA, NY

19.   Favorite sports to watch?

Cricket and F1

20.   One nice thing about the person who sent this to you?

Reema – She’s very sweet and I call her my heroine and Jaaneman too! Love ya loads!

21.   What’s under your bed?

Dust 😀 (Over the bed lust – just to make it rhyming :P)

22.   Would you like to be born as yourself again?

No, I want to be born again as a girl

23.   Morning person or night owl?

Morning person

24.   Over easy, or sunny side up?

None – I like it over hard! Soft Yolk is ewwwww!

25.   Favorite place to relax?

Home Sweet Home

26.   Favorite pie?

Creamy chocolate pie..yummy!

27.   Favorite ice cream flavor?

Anything but mint

28.   Of all the people you tagged this to, who’s most likely to respond first?

I tag everybody in my blogroll and everybody it is (includes people in love )J I think Anu would be the quickest!

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June 23, 2008

Those 160 characters

Posted in Uncategorized at 5:35 am by RJ

hru? ltnc lts mt up tc lu hgs. This might seem perfect to those who understand the whole idea of text messaging. I would be addled if I received such a message. It’s time for some flashback guys. This whole concept of text messaging started the day cell phones were invented. When the phone service providers started charging extra bucks for more than 160 characters people started limiting their message length. So here you go, a whole new language is created by omitting the vowels and sometimes even the consonants. It’s called “Text Messages”

Scene this: A fresher sends a mail to his project manager. This is what he had to write – Compltd prj impl doc. Plz revw n send it acrs. I completely understood what he wanted to mention but do not appreciate such language in a formal environment. Mobile-talk creeping into the official mails is not accepted for most of the managers.

This new language also brings up a whole new concept of abbreviations. I was chatting with one of my friends related to her personal life and during the conversation she typed ‘abc’ & I did not understand what it meant so continued chatting. Later she told me that I had screwed up and it actually meant “Adult behind computer” – how the heck do you figure that out? The other so called new (atleast for me) buzz words is sos – someone over shoulder, motn? – make out tonite? (Yes, ofcourse! :D), lue – love you endlessly, brb – be right back and the list never ends.

Indians stare at unusual things. Yea, kissing on the roads is unsual and we stare. My friend & I had just finished lunch and saw two Indians kissing on the street across. He quickly exclaimed, “Do you see those ABCDE’s?” I questioned, “ABCDE’s? What’s that supposed to mean?” He replied, “American Born Confused Desi Expressing!” Phew! Who creates these words?  I have noticed people making an already shorter word more short for e.g. yes = s, care = cr, love = lv, you = u, the = da and last but not the least, ok becomes k. Can you beat that?

According to me, use of short words is a smart way of communicating through mobile phones and chat, probably not in exams and official mails. Having said that, language evolves and language is a medium of communicating between two parties. We no longer use the Shakespearean English or the Queen’s English. Soon, you could probably see a dictionary on Text Messaging words which is universally accepted.

I would want to know your take on this? Words getting shorter for good, should it be accepted in exams? Official mails? Speak your mind.

I tg al my redrs 2 wrt a pst in sch a lang da so cald txt lang. Da tg hs 2 b compltd by all blgrl fels, da 1 who is inactiv, da 1 on vatn, da 1 vistng chnai, da 1 wrtng xams, da 1 in lv, da 1 celebrtng bday, da 1 byng lappy n da 1 readng. I jz compltd mne 🙂

~RJ

P.S The message above meant “How are you? Let’s meet up. Take care. Love you. Hugs” Unfortunately, I did not receive it!!

June 20, 2008

I need that ‘kiss’

Posted in Uncategorized at 4:00 pm by RJ

My manager, female, 32 years is beautiful, cute, and hot and we all know that young guys 🙂 have something for older women and I was from no outer space to ignore that. She called me the other day in the morning to discuss about a new process and just before hanging up, she said, “RJ, I need that kiss!” I always knew she had a thing or two for me coz’ I could figure that out from her smile. The way she smiles at me was worth a million bucks.

I was looking for an opportunity to go and talk to her rather than a phone conversation so that I could actually see how she looked that day. I got up to drink water even when I already had 1gal of water peed a million times since morning. She was wearing this beautiful white polka dots black dress, knee length and had the most amazing pair of legs one could see in the history of beautiful women. As she saw me passed by, she called me, “RJ, can you come here for a second?” Hurray, how cool it could get to kiss around the corner in office where nobody could see. I thought.

I was like, “Hey, you cool nice” and she smiled and said, “Thanks, and you know I need the kiss”.

I was almost blushing and told her, “Sure thing, anything for you!”

I came back to my desk walking fast, no actually rolling and bouncing with happiness, sat at my desk and kept wondering, “How, when, where”. Just when I started to dream about my coziness with my manager, my phone rang again and it was from her. This is what I love about the caller-id technology. You know how you have to respond before answering the call. I said a blushing and happy, “Yessss” and she was quick to ignore that and asked me, “How far have you got?” I said, “Hmm, how far? means? I mean…” She’s said, “I told you, we need the process document done today”. I got relieved and said, “Oh that, I will get it to you today EOD” She repeated, “Remember the kiss?” I said, “How can I forget that?” and blushed. She further continued saying, “its better that way and then you can get it done today. Keep it simple stupid and that’s why a kiss helps.” I now understood the whole kiss story and kursed (sounds a bit like kissed) her! So kiss is Keep It Simple Stupid and it’s a term used by my dept folks when you got to roll something pretty fast. Obviously, I complicated her simple thought and started building my own imagination!

We got the process rolled out the same day which means kissed her! I got to learn a whole new “Kiss” stuff. Keep It Simple Stupid is something when followed in life might help us too. Rather than complicating things, now I keep it simple as much as I can. It helps. Complication is the root cause of complication. Like our very own Albert Einstein says, “Three Rules of Work: Out of clutter find simplicity; from discord find harmony; In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.”

Keep it simple & muaaah,
~RJ

June 17, 2008

I post this coz’ I have been tagged :D

Posted in Uncategorized at 10:35 am by RJ

Reems tagged me with this ‘I’ stuff. Here’s my take on it.

I am at work now. Monday morning. Boringggggg!

I think there should be 4 working days from Tues – Fri and 3 holidays Sat – Mon. C’mon this is fair enough!

I know what I think (above) is not possible

I want to build my own house. At the moment I want to go to the restroom. BRB

I have a feeling that I will be a good father

I wish I live one day in my lifetime where there’s no hatred, discrimination – just one day!

I hate olives. Black, green – can’t take it for a treasure!

I miss the roadside chai + vada-pav + rains!! Wow!

I fear of locking my keys inside the car someday

I feel I am giving stupid answers L

I hear that Kat & Akki have a thing going on!! Is it true? Damn! Poor Sallu!

I smell like Perry Ellis 360

I crave for chocolates, ice cream and my mom’s poha…yummy!

I search using Google. Isn’t it one of the best creations of this decade?

I wonder why I can’t sleep for more than 5 hours

I regret nothing. Everything happens for a reason.

I love to talk. I can talk about anything and everything at any time! People have issues still 😀  

I ache hmm I don’t know. But it aches to finish this whole damn thing 😀

I care….do you?

I always am game for trying out new restaurants

I am not a very good looking guy

I believe looks doesn’t matter 😀 and I believe grapes are sour

I dance terribly. People say I am a street dancer and can only groove to the Nasik dhol music

I sing even terribly. I can hum a tune

I cry watching emotional movies – only sometimes guys! Don’t take my case royally on this one – just being honest yaaaa J

I don’t always take 2 days to write a post. Its Tuesday morning & I started to write this yesterday.

I fight very rarely and think about a solution.

I write pretty neat. I always won 2nd prize from grade 1 to grade 10 in the handwriting competition. Jeetal Shah stood first. Hope she’s doing well!

I win racquet ball games now-a-days. I won 4 of 5 games after losing 22 games! It’s a great feeling.

I lose and learn from my mistakes

I never understood the definition of a best friend. I don’t know who my best friend is!

I confuse people who confuse me

I listen very carefully and people say I am good listener.

I can usually be found asking weird questions. “Yeh aisa kyon hain? Yeh waisa kyon hain?”

I am scared of cockroaches (dead or alive doesn’t matter)

I need something to eat now. It’s close to lunch time and I am starving!!

I am happy about the fact that its finally ended…aarrrgh Reems 😀 I am also happy about the fact that we have a nice small blogging community and to know good people (friends now) and their good thoughts!

I tag everybody listed on my blogroll and that includes Sandeep and Nikhil also 😀

Keep tagging, keep smiling & dont curse me,

~RJ

June 16, 2008

The WordPressing begins

Posted in Uncategorized at 10:11 am by RJ

So here I am, finally typing one in WP. All you illegal brand ambassadors who convinced the hell out of me, you know what I actually like it. It’s cool. I would like it more when Reema and Sakhi join WP. Let’s team up up guys and do what needs to be done to get them here.

Still a lot of stuff to be done on this page. I already got few comments on how they hate the theme. I will try to make it look better. It was smarty Sandeep, cutie Bhavna and rockstar Priya who kept asking me to move and I am sure they like it more now – the illegal brand ambassadors!!

I gotto mention about Megs – awww, she stayed up till 5:30am to help me get setup with WP. She answered the dumbest of questions, told me my things to do and told me about each and every functionality almost. Thanks a million bunchie buddy and my sweet robot! You da best!

Anubha, Reema & Sakhi – Looking forward to see you guys in WP soon. Blogspot? what’s that?

Happy wordpressing,

~RJ

June 13, 2008

The Expansionist Meme – Tagged!

Posted in Uncategorized at 4:16 am by RJ

Nova aka World tagged me with this meme and here’s my response.

Please thoughtfully consider the following, and choose one item for each of the categories below. (Be sure to describe your reasons for choosing)

Q: One religious work from a non-familiar tradition you’ll read:
A: I think its called the “Tanakh”. I always wanted to know and read about the Jewish tradition.

Q: One music video–that you like–from your “least likely to listen to’ genre:
A: Main Yahan Tu Wahaan – Baghban (Amitabh Bachchan sung the song) I don’t like super slow emotional songs – but this one is an exception coz’ 1) Amitabh Bachchan sang it 2) I like the whole idea of singing a song over the phone 😀 nice noo?

Q: A book from a genre you almost never read, that you have read, or you will read (promise!):
A: Andrew Tanenbaum – Operating Systems and Networking 😀 😛

Q: Somewhere you’d never thought to go on holiday/vacation, and why it might be fun to go there?
A: Andaman and Nicobar Islands – I think the whole island thg is exciting. Somewhere far yet close kinda thgy!

Q: A specific food you’ve never tried, but will because of this meme, honest!:
A: Mongolian cuisine – heard a lot about it, now I am gonna try it soon. (As soon as this weekend!)

Q: A sport or game you really hate, or haven’t tried yet, but are willing to give one more go:
A: I like all kinda sports and game. I haven’t tried baseball and given a chance would love to play that game. I also want to play that girls game – where they throw somethg closing their eyes and have to jump and land in a specific spot. Dont know the name but it looks exciting!

Q: A style of dance you probably won’t try (we won’t make you promise on this one):
A: Cha cha Cha, a lot of foot work and I think I will screw up big time!

Q: A career job you don’t feel you’re suited for, and why:
A: I can never be a doctor/surgeon – I can’t see flesh, blood etc and be cool about it.

Q: An item that’s “thinking out of the box’ for this meme that hadn’t been included:
A: Probably the “next question please” 😛

Q: If there’s one thing in life you wanted to do, and will do because of this meme, what will it be?
A: Meet up with Nova and play foosball with her 😀

I tag my blog fellas to mention one item they did that bought a smile on their face. I got up to give my seat to a pregnant lady in the train and I felt unusually happy about it and smiled the whole day 🙂

Keep smiling, keep writing and stay healthy,
~RJ

June 7, 2008

Parents day, everyday!

Posted in Uncategorized at 11:26 pm by RJ

A new message arrived. My gmail inbox subject line reads “Looking for great father’s day gift ideas? 40% on father’s day hampers and free shipping to India.” This is from one of those send-gifts-to-India portals. I start thinking what would be nice for my dad and it reminded me of mother’s day which was about 4 weeks back.

Sunday, May 11, whoaa! I got up early to call up mom! She was super excited to hear my voice and as I finished hearing her stories in her mellifluous voice – I was super charged! And it’s known that in our family of 4, my mother and me suffer from logorrhea – atleast that’s what my dad and bro feel!

Excited I was, planned to treat myself some chocolate kiwi walnut fudge from Joann’s Patiserrie
& cookies. As I drove past main street, I saw about 20 old people standing with some hoardings which I didn’t read then and looked around to see what was happening. Everybody around were calm, doing their work in the regular fashion and not seem to be distracted as I was looking at that flock of old people. One of the hoarding caught my attention and it read, “I am just like your mother, will you not wish me for mother’s day?”

I thought it was some kind of fund raising events for mother’s day till I read the next hoarding. They all were standing below their so called home called “St. Patrick’s Senior Living Center” (Read: Old Age Home). The second hoarding read “Adopt me, I will be like your father”, third read “Am I that bad to be abandoned?”, fourth read, “Can you be my child to me?” and probably a 12 more hoardings like that. Being an emotional enough person, I felt purblind for a while. The ‘Maa’ song from TZP added that little extra effect!

The oldies standing there are in hope of someone who could come and take them away not because the old age home treats them with cruelty but coz’ they could lead a dignified life and prove themselves and to their children that they are not that bad to be abandoned. Some don’t curse their kismet and are patiently waiting for their children to come and see them for mother’s day!

I quickly called up my mom again and felt a million times better when I heard her say, “Enna ma achu?” ?( What happened dear?) and I replied back saying, “Nothing, just felt like talking a bit more!” Amidst my lachrymose feeling, I still had questions in my mind and one of them was, “How could somebody hate their parents so much to abandon them?”

I switch on the repeat mode in my ipod and listen to the “Maa” song again till I drive back home! ~RJ

June 2, 2008

Sarad ki kahani, ek nadaan ki zubaani!

Posted in Uncategorized at 2:24 pm by RJ

A successful IPL season and it was Rajasthan Royals(RR) all way along. Frankly, I underestimated RR big time. A big Kolkata Knight Riders fan it’s been disappointing to see they couldn’t even make it to the semi-finals. The IPL is over, RR wins the inaugaural IPL. Life’s getting boring, so what next? Let’s step one step backward and figure out how it all started. My version of the IPL prelude.

Its called “Sarad ki kahani, ek nadaan ki zubaani!”

Sarad Paar: A top notch politician, chairman of the IPL organising committee. He’s the big one and he wants all the moolah!

Nimbupaani: Supposedly, one of the world’s richest beings around. 6 family members and 600 servants live together!

Rukruk Khan: He’s numero one in the movie circuit. He’s got the charm, the 6-packs and K-K-Karan!

Tendlya: He’s numero one in the cricket arena. He’s got the injury, the advertisements and the nails to bite!

Plus supporting cast – thanks to all!

Sarad is all upset with Sabhish Kandra(Owner of a television channel) because he entered the cricket world and is getting all the money and fame. Sarad decides to earn some black moolah using his idea and sketches out a plan overnight. He decides to call the top people from page 3 circuit after his thought – “Chailaa, maala suru karaaycha hota aani hyaani kelaa! Kaahi tari karaylaa havaa, gheto mi henchi barobar aani kapil chi pan maarto! Mee IPL suru karto”

He needs initial funds to execute the whole idea and calls up the “fund-man” Nimbupaani.

Tring tring…

Sarad: He-lo, kaise…se ho app sirji..hum-hein hein yaad rak-koko

Nimbupaani: Abe Sarad kabhi sudhrega, itnaa paisaa toh lutaa cricket se, muh ka operation nahi karvaaya ab tak, kanjus! Kya hua thik se muh kholke bol

Saarad: Woh chodo sir, paisa daalo, double karke detaa hu. You see double return in just 2 months sir!

Nimbupaani: Huh? Paise daalo double karegaa? Yeda samjhaa hai kya re. Saale, main idhar Chilaince mein baithe ande ubaal raha hoon?

Sarad: Sir, aap puri baat sunlo. IPL cha-alu karenge. Logon ko nangaa karenge, Rukruk Khan ko nachaayenge! Kaun-si te-am chahiy-e bolona??!!

Nimbupaani: Apna Tendlya chahiye mereko, bas team mein woh hua toh kaafi hai! Baaki semi-final aur finals apne ground mein hona chahiye!

Sarad: Thik hai, tikh hain sir, Mum-bai lelo aap

Nimbupaani: Haan, besttt! Anil bhi bahot udd raha hai aaj kal, mast jalegaa saala. 2 mahine mein 30crore ko 600crore maltab ek naya ghar!

Sarad : Ha-an, uss-kaa tu ten-shun mat le! (chailaa hyaala marathi yet naahi, malaa hindi yet naahi)

Nimbupaani: Tu apne muh ka kuch kar re, main jaa raha hu sone!!

Sarad : Haan sir, cheque bhej do aap. Bye.

So Nimbupaani decides to buy the Mumbai Indians, the city with the biggest corporates, big sponsors and ofcourse Tendlya!

Now, Sarad is nervous and calls Tendlya to update the story!

Tring tring…

Tendlya: Ailla..hello kon?

Sarad: Aga Anjali, Tendlya la phone de zaraa

Tendlya: Ailaa…Sarad kaka mi Tendlya-ach boltoy!! Team koni ghetli?

Sarad: nimbupaani ni!

Tendlya: Ailaa..changlaa zhaala..rakkam pakki karun taak tu..faayda zhaalaa pahije aaplaa!

Sarad: Faayda hoyel re..tulaa kaay vaatla!! Fukat naahi baslo mi ithe, tu jaasta kaalji nako karus! Tuzaa naav asnaar team madhe mag tulaa aadhi injure sangoon amhi baaki players na paathvu! Tu aaram kar aani te RMF cha deal madhey maaza percentage…

Tendlya: Ailaa.. ho denaar denaar! Injury mastaa, chaalel-chaalel!

Sarad: Chal aata Rukrukla fone laavto

Tendlya: Thik aahe, thevto aata!

Next up, Sarad Paar decides to call Rukruk Khan.
Tring tring…

Sarad: He-lo

Karan: Hello, you’re speaking to Karan Johar in RRK’s Mannat and…

Sarad: Abbe gud boy, coffee peelana kam kar aur RRK ko phone de saala apna hostgiri kab band karegaa kya maloom

Karan: *Sob* Aapko acche se baat karne nahi aati kya *sob* ………. RRK its for u!

RRK: Hello ?

Sarad: K-ya re, bhabie gh-ar pe nahi hai k-ya?

RRK: (background music playing – eeeehhhhhhh kantabehen) Kya hua bol sarad?

Sarad: Pai-saa kamaane-ka hai k-yaa ??

RRK: K-k-k-k-kaise???

Sarad: IPL chaalu karegaa .. ba-hot lut-egaa public ko..kya boltai tu?

SRK: Arre waah! Idea mast hai re!! Idhar meri bhi lagi padi hai, yeh Akshay bahot footage khaata hai aaj kal! Aur tune Akshay ko koi bhi function mein bulaya naa-toh yaad rakh. Mein King Khan hoon kuch bhi kar sakta hoon mere films promote hone chahiye aur mujhe naachne bhi milna chahiye udhar

Sarad: Demand bahot karne lag-aa hai tu a-aj kal!!! Thik h-ai..dekh-ta hoon main kya kar saktaaa hu ….kaunsi team legaa? Mukesh ne Mumbai le li hain

RRK: Havrat saala.. kitna kamaayega!! Kolkatta de mujhe, Dada bhi form mein hai aur udhar ka public bhi yedaa hai, sab uthke aatein hai match dekhneko

Sarad: Th-ik ha-i , Kolkatta te-raa..

RRK: Ek kaam kar na, Ugly Zhinta ko bhi pucchh – nahi toh mere pe shak aayega sabko ki despo hai publicity ke liye karke!

Sarad : Abe paagal hai kya, uske paas kya hai, uski toh abhi koi film bhi nahi a-ati! Kaam karta hu, Fajitabh ko fone lagaata hu??!!

RRK: Sharad faaltugiri nahi chahiye haa! Main idhar paise de dekar King Khan bann raha hu aur tu usko mere saath kyo bhid raha hai?? Budda khajayegaa poore stadium ko aur mereko limelight nahi milegaa. Tu Ugly Zhinta ko lagaa, bombay dyeing leke baithi hai woh Nadia Mess ko yedia banaa!

Sarad : Abe Mumbai Dyeing bol, woh Aaj Kurkure aake gaadi fodega tera, aaj kal mar raha hai woh bhi publicity ke liye!

RRK: Sach baat bolu kya re sarad – jab usne Fajitabh ka ghar foda naa, main aur Chori bahut khush hua maloom. Saala kuch bhi bol lekin budde mein baat hai
Sarad : Ha-ha-ha.. *cough* Chal fone laga-ata hu Ugly Zhinta ko ..

RRK : Haan chal bye. K-k-k-karan where did u go?? (background music playing – eeeehhhhhhh kantabehen)

So this way, Nimbupaani buys Mumbai Indians, RRK buys the Kolkatta Knight Riders and Sarad convinces Ugly and Mess into buying Punjab!

It begins and voila! Its a success! Probably success is an understatement! When we think of that one thing that can surely be a bit, its either Bollywood or Cricket. And IPL gave us a perfect blend of the two. People were happy, and so were the team managers, players and our very own Sarad Paar. What it needs to be the IPL champ is not the celebrities, not the corporate houses but a good captain leading from the front and a blend of high-performing players. RR had it all! They deserved it!

Disclaimer : This should be taken lightly with a sense of humour. This is not to hurt anybody’s feelings or sentiments. Any similarity of name, events, location is purely co-incidental. The author of this post has complete respect for Sharad Pawar, Subhash Chandra, Kapil Dev, Mukesh Ambani, Anil Ambani, Sachin Tendulkar, Shahrukh Khan, Karan Johar, Amitabh Bacchan, Ranbir Kapoor, Aishwariya Rai, Preity Zinta and Ness Wadia. Raj Thackery too!

P.S Thanks Neetu, Deval, Gauri & Altaf. Anubha – thanks for everything! You da best!

May 30, 2008

Paanch minute hain tumhare paas! Paanch minute!

Posted in Uncategorized at 6:34 am by RJ

5 minutes is 300 seconds – as if nobody knew!! These 300 seconds sometimes feel so long and sometimes just fades away even before you could react. I had tagged Anubha about her take on 5 minutes and here’s her work. Isn’t she the best and cute? Since I loved the topic so much I wanted to come up with my version of 5 minutes – hope you enjoy reading this too!

Ever wondered why this 5 minutes acts weirdly crazy on us? The extra 5 minutes of the morning sleep dismisses quickly leaving behind a not-so-rhythmic sound of the alarm clock. The buzzing never seems to happen when you are all geared up for a trek, a visit to a water park or a hill-station outing. Ever wondered why?

Read on: It’s just not about the extra sleep, it’s about a zillion things that the happens to us in the daily routine. It’s 4:55PM, I am at work, absolutely seeing every second ticking away, but it doesnt’t seem to end. This time, perhaps, the 300 seconds just decided to move at a pace of 3000 seconds! Phew! Earlier in the same day, it was my weekly status meeting and obviously I forgot to get my reports done. For my status meeting at 11AM I started to work on my report at 10:45AM and the 15 minutes just vanished. Aaargh!

Scene this – My friend is smiling and staring at the laptop. I asked him, “Dude, wassup? What are you smiling at?” He responds back, “Arre, woh aanewali hain 5 minute mein!!” He is over-joyous and is watiting for his girlfriend and they chat their weekend away to glory. I meet him almost at the end of the day and he shoots a statement, “Twas so quick yaar!!” (Damn, it was more than 8 hours!!)

5 minutes before a break during a lecture seem so long and the 5 minutes of the break seems shorter. 5 minutes of the flight delay when you plan to meet your girlfriend seem long and the 5 minutes while kissing her goodbye seems shorter.

Ever wondered why? How does these 5 minutes matter to you? Why?

Yet to understand the tale of 5 minutes,
~RJ

May 28, 2008

I want to be a girl!

Posted in Uncategorized at 3:52 am by RJ

Folks, before you start your thinking engines, this ain’t any kind of a ribald humour neither am I promoting the sex change operation. But if there is another life that I could live, I want to be born as a girl! I have my own reasons and maybe this would get through your gates too.

One of the most important reasons I want to be a girl is the priviledge of giving birth to someone. Guys – all of you are also involved in the process but as always we do the easy thing and get out leaving the pain for them to suffer. I would love to see myself giving birth to someone and taking the onus to bear that pain for once. I know this could sound as a wacka cracken thought but in this age where fathers are killing daughters, children killing their parents, husbands killing wives, death tolls taking a top gear and all this happening mercilessly , I want to give birth to feel special, to feel that something and then hear someone say to me, “You did good, you were brave. He/She looks exactly like you”. Whoa! I get the jitters!

Read on – I am not crazy! I feel a million percent that girls are smarter than guys in most of the aspects. Scene this: Our family of 4 finished lunch and we are all helping mom to put the used utensils in the sink. My mom tells my dad to transfer the left over dal to a smaller utensil so that she could clean the bigger one which she used to cook the dal. And what follows is super fun – my dad obviously picks a smaller utensil pours the dal into it just to find that its much smaller to hold everything. Mom gives him a stare and tells him in tamil, “aacha..oru vellai ki iru vellai acha” roughly meaning “Did you successfully manage to increase my workload 200%?”. My dad is helplessly grinning. This is a comparison of a 30 years experienced, distinction graded Civil Engineer vs a metric passed woman!! My mom could say what would fit into what with her eyes closed – not because shes trained on household chores, because she’s a woman and women are smarter! Let’s just plainly accept it!

It’s not only about a housemaker, consider an architect, an interior designer, a fashion designer, a choregrapher, a painter – I am sure their work is better than a male conterpart. The reason is women see colors, the way it should be seen, they see it with all liveliness. I would think one of the major reasons this happens is because they talk about others earrings, their dress, their hairstyle, neigbours furniture etc. Talking about these things invariably improves their creative mastery. Can you imagine a guy saying, “Dude, that’s a nice tie-pin. I wanted to buy one like that for ages?”

Many of my friends complained that its the gossip that we can’t handle. I am so sure that guys love all the gossip. The husbands like to hear from their wife about their neighbours job, trust me I have seen such cases. Once in the elevator, a guy telling his colleague, “Did Tanya file her divorce? She was screaming over the phone the other day, I think it was her husband.” The other guy asks, “What was she saying?” If woman gossip, men gossip too!

Lets give them their space, its ok for them to talk about earrings, necklaces, scarves, shoe color, finger rings, lipsticks when you talk about X-box, PSP, BMW Z series, Ironman & cricket!!

We don’t want to live in a planet where everybody think from their mind. We need people to think from their heart too and only they can do it. For those who think women can just take decisions thinking from heart, remember we have a political leader of a ruling party and the President of the nation as live examples.

I wanna be a girl and hail womanhood! (P.S I am not a feminist!)
~RJ

Note: All my guy friends I still love you and I am not gay! Feel happy that I can be your girlfriend in your next life! LOL!

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